My Three

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Cash boy is a week and one day old today! I will spare everyone the "it's gone by so fast" line because it seems that it's been everyone's go-to phrase when talking to me lately. YES I know it goes fast, can I punch you in the face now? We are in complete bliss over here. Jax and Jonah love their little brother. They ask me if they can hold him all day. Jax is quite the little babysitter. He holds Cash while I quickly shower and he does so great. He's a little overconfident at times. The other day he was holding Cash on the couch and McKay and I ran upstairs really quick and all of the sudden we hear "Mom! I'm coming up the stairs!" McKay and I both freaked out a little inside but tried to stay calm so he wouldn't drop him! It reminded me of when Jonah was a newborn, sleeping on our bed while I was across the hall in our bonus room. Then suddenly my two-year-old little Jax popped up in the doorway, holding his newborn brother. Scary! But Jax loves Cash so much. We have made lots and lots of "rules." We're still working on following them...

Cash is a dream baby. He wakes up either once or twice a night. He's a good nurser. He's a cuddler. If he can't sleep at night, I lie him right on my chest and we can both sleep for hours like that. I feel like I can't get enough of him. It still feels weird to have him not in my tummy sometimes. I feel like I just can't get close enough. I'm always amazed at the amount of love I feel for my new babies. It's a celestial kind of love. Yesterday in ward council we had a training and we talked about how on this earth, even though it is a telestial place, we can still experience terrestrial and celestial joy. It totally resonated with me. Because every time I bring a newborn baby home, I just can't imagine ever feeling that much joy and happiness and fulfillment in any other circumstance. I sincerely don't believe it's possible. How can any feeling ever be better? Maybe in heaven we just relive the days when we have a newborn. That would be my heaven.

Cash smiles all the time in his sleep! More than I think Jax or Jonah did. He never has cried unless he's hungry. He's just so perfect. Jax and Jonah are still adjusting. Today Jonah told me that I have "two babies" and I pulled him onto my lap and said, you're right! You are mommy's baby huh? I thought I would feel more guilt trying to split my attention, but I haven't as much as I thought. Cash is so easy, that it's easy to split myself three ways. McKay is the one who gets not much attention. We always tell each other we miss each other when we have a newborn haha. But anyways! Jax is at t-ball and Jones and Cash are sleeping- so this is precious time! I'll write more soon.