Tuesday, October 30, 2012

A Pink Story


My mom found out she had Breast Cancer when I was a senior in high school. 
We had gotten home from school one day and were sitting in the family room- lounged across the couch and the floor with the TV on. My mom sat on the fireplace facing us and very non-chalantly told us that she had something to tell us- with a precursor that it was "no big deal." 
I don't remember much more about that day- only going down to my room and sitting on my bed and feeling something that made it so I couldn't talk and couldn't think.
I never remember it being a foreign subject- or a negative subject in my house after that- just something that was going on. I remember my mom beginning to lose her hair and saying that her head itched. She found me one day and told me that I could cut her hair any way that I wanted. We went into her bathroom and I chose a bob. I always thought my mom would look cute with a bob, and she totally did. I cut her hair and we laughed and took lots of pictures. Within the next couple-ish weeks, she shaved her head. My brother Cody and I drove home from school every day wondering if my mom had done it or not. I remember being really really nervous every time we were driving home and about to open the front door. One day we got home and my mom was sitting on her computer with a black hat on. She showed us her head (and we probably felt it) and she wore a wig (sometimes) after that.

 I've thought about this the last couple of days- and am amazed (and a little surprised) that most of the memories I come up with were about my mom's hair. And I attribute that to a mom who somehow made good memories out of something that was truly horrible. I never doubt that my mom had moments of pure desperation or days of worry. I'm sure she probably had lots of sleepless nights and some moments of panic. Lots of time was probably spent wondering "what if," and many days spent in exhaustion and weakness. But this I am grateful for:

1. A mom who precedes everything hard with "don't worry"
2. A mom who laughed at her bald head
3. A mom who let me cut her hair and her wig, because she knew those were the memories I needed
4. Family and friends who cleaned our house and made us meals
6. Modern Medicine
7. Doctors and nurses who became my mom's friends
8. A mom who brought me lunch to school without a wig on
(though I may not have been grateful for that at the time. ha.)

Thanks mom

31 comments:

  1. Ali,

    This post is wonderful and so touching. It brought tears to my eyes. Making light out of a tough situation is not easy. It sounds like you and your family were the perfect positive support system for her. Love this post! I will definitely be following your blog from now on :-) You're amazing!

    XO Jenna

    Demureindiamonds.blogspot.com

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  2. LOVELY. you, the writing, the memories. just lovely.

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  3. Everything about this was just so amazing. Your momma sounds like a truly wonderful and inspiring woman, just like you miss!

    Gorgeous.

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  4. Ahhh..this story made me tear up :) Such a warming story for you to share with all of us. I lost my Dad four years ago to Pancreatic cancer and for some reason, he never lost any of his hair during treatment. I always wondered why. You have such a cute, loving family all around :)

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  5. what a beautiful post. your mom sounds amazing!

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  6. my mom got breast cancer when i was a junior in high school and she reacted the same way. i actually loved my mom's wig. looks like you've got yourself a really strong mom :)

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  7. you have an amazing mom. thank you for sharing your story with us. it made my day!

    xo
    osmiuminlove.blogspot.com

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  8. i really admire women like that. that can take the worst of news but never let it dampen their spirit. that's a great mother right there!

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  9. This is an absolutely beautiful post and made me teary eyed :-) Thank you for sharing this.

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  10. awww, your mom is beautiful. and so are you!!

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  11. This made me tear-up! Such a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing this with us. <3

    <3 Chelsea Elizabeth

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  12. what a wonderful post Ali! Thanks for beautifully sharing your mom's strength and your experience. thanks for visiting my blog :)

    Chioma
    C's Evolution of Style

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  13. wow, such a wonderful post Ali, very touching, and inspiring, thanks for sharing this with us :)

    p.s.: thanks for the follow, following you back on gfc :)

    http://www.counttofour.com

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  14. Ali, thank you for sharing this. Really touching and inspiring:)!

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  15. Wow.
    I teared up a bit reading that story, your mom is a pretty amazing women. (To say "Don't worry?" That take some serious strength.)
    I lost my best friend two years ago to breast cancer, it's a pretty vicious disease and it's pretty amazing that you have these special memories of your mother and how strong she was through the treatment. And oh my gosh, that last picture is just too sweet.

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  16. I read this entire post with tears in my eyes. Such a sweet tribute to your sweet mom! I have almost an identical story, so I definitely relate. Moms are the best, the BEST! :) Thanks for sharing, girl.

    xo

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    1. That is so neat! Moms definitely are the best! :)

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  17. What an amazing mother. Wow. Thank you for sharing her story. :) Beautiful pictures, too!

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  18. this was such a sweet and touching story, thanks for sharing it so much. you have a beautiful blog =)

    love from the NANA girls xoxo

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  19. Such a touching post. I think cancer effects just about everyone in some way. If not directly, we all know someone who has battled it. Your mom is a strong woman. So sweet of you to share a little of her story.

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  20. Such a beautiful post about your mother.
    Cancer is such a nasty battle, and it touches the lives of so many people.
    What an incredible blessing that your mother has become a survivor and continues to bless the lives around her!
    I know what you mean about the hair...my mother had Leukemia and when she started to lose her hair we had a "head shaving party" in the hospital.
    My mother, won her battle against cancer, but lost her battle to infections immediately following.
    {Literally the doctors went in one day and said, "The cancer is gone, we have no idea how this happened?!?!" God is good, even when we don't understand it}.
    Thank you for sharing this story, one day i'll share mine about my mother. <3

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  21. what a beautiful story! I'm glad that you have such good memories of that time with your mom.
    thanks for sharing!

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  22. Thanks for sharing your story, and so glad it had a happy ending.
    Ginny
    mynewfavoriteoutfit.blogspot.com

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  23. Such a great story - so glad you shared this. I hate that cancer has touched so many of us.

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  24. Beautiful story, great blog, want to follow each other?

    WWW.ROXTHEFOX.COM

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  25. This is an absolutely amazing story, so touching. Your mother must have been very, very strong. I sometimes wonder where mothers get their super powers from?

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  26. Sweet Ali! I had no idea... your mom sounds amazing. And funny. And sweet. All those qualities that you possess too. What a fighter! I love learning more about you and your family. You amaze me more everyday. Hugs.

    p.s. I remember running into your mom at the soccer game a few Saturdays ago.. (remember when we ran into each other?) Anyway... I remember how bubbly and nice she was with me. So warm:)

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  27. i'm sitting at my desk, crying my eyes out. my heart is so full reading about how strong your mama is and how hard she fought. she sounds so much like my mom and her fight with ovarian cancer. she never wanted me to worry, even though that's all i ever did. she wanted to make memories full of laughter and love instead of grief and stress. i can't begin to imagine the private suffering and worrying she did but she never let me see it....part of me wishes i could have shared that with her if it could have taken some of it off her shoulders, but i know she wouldn;t have wanted that. bless your mama's sweet heart.

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