Saturday, January 7, 2012

Help Me

Okay...I am in need of some mom-to-mom advice. This is my blog so I can be honest right? I have tried really hard not to make this just one of those "Seriously, SO blessed!" blogs. So don't judge. 

So guys... what do you do when you just want to watch TV (or blog, or read...or whatever you like to do to relax)? I have this big problem called GUILT when it's 10:00 and I just want to sit on my bum on our couch and do nothing for the rest of the night. Obviously it's not the sitting on the bum part that makes me feel's the tiny five-month-old, smiley, taking-everything-about-the-world-in, impressionable little boy on my lap. 

Of course our days are not spent watching TV. We do everything that a mommy and son do all day, but when housework is done for the day, dinner is cleaned up, other stuff is finished, and it's 10:00, sometimes I feel like just turning the TV on and turning off my brain (seriously...don't judge me)...and Jax will still be up for another two hours. 

I have actually googled this, and I get answers like: 

"We NEVER have let our 9 month old watch TV. There's no reason for it. He has so much else in the world to explore."

"It is pitiful that people feel the need to rationalize their own addiction to sitting and watching tv rather than living in order to justify using the television or other media as a substitute for having a meaningful interaction with their children. Whether it is labeled "educational" or not, it is not good for children, end of story"

Oh and my favorite...

"NO TELEVISION!!! children shouldn't even look at a tv screen for more than 30 seconds before the age of 2. Who knows what the flashing lights could do to their brains"

I'm sorry...but when I read these things, this is all I picture:

Just to, I am not talking about sitting him in front of the TV to entertain, we do not watch TV at 3:00 in the afternoon for two, I am not addicted to the TV...YES, I want to have "meaningful interaction with my child," but after 14 hours of "meaningful interaction"...

YES I want to watch TV for one hour (or whatever...)

 Is this bad?

So this is where I need help! Moms...what do you do? Do you put your baby next to you with toys? Do you just hold them and cuddle them and let them look at the TV screen (I feel weird about this for some reason)? Do you just never get tired and play and play and play from 8am to 12am? :/


  1. There is nothing wrong with getting a breather for an hour or so. Let him entertain himself. Gavin is only two months old and I already let him have alone time on his play pad for about 30 minutes. I don't feel guilty because we spend plenty of quality time together. -Not to mention I think it's important for him to learn that it's ok for him to be alone for a little while and that even though I'm not holding him, mommy is nearby. -good luck!

  2. I don't think T.V is wrong at all so when ya want to sit down for an hour there is not one problem with that or whatever ya want to sit down and do "so NEVER feel bad" and those mothers that give you comments like that don't let it bother you who knows what they do because I guarantee they do other things that are horrible to their children but, its ok to them to judge others so don't ever let what they have to say bother ya :) Hope your having a fantastic day :)

  3. also not letting them get alone time or time in his own little world makes it hard for you to get time away or harder for them to be with others while you want to get away they need some independence/alone time now and them so they know your going to always be there but, mommy always needs some time to herself :) Hope this helped in some way

  4. So, i totally blog stalk you- but its ok because i'm mckays cousin ;) I just had a thought, I remember with my first baby- I totally felt like I had no time for myself because she was up all night and her schedule was messed up. I am not exactly sure how old Jax is but with my second baby, I made it a point to make sure that at 4 months I incorporated a schedule into his life. THIS SAVED ME! If at all possible, try to get Jax to bed by 7 or 8 every night so you get your alone time. It might be hard at first because he's not used to it, but he will get the hang of it soon. Its totally normal to feel guilty, but there is a fix to this problem. Putting my baby on a schedule honestly saved my marriage and my sanity. Ok, and totally just disregard this if i'm overstepping my boundaries here. Mommy always knows best and there is probably something I dont know about the situation.Do what you feel is best and you cant go wrong! oh and PS) if Jax still goes to bed late and you just end up letting him sit on your lap while you do the computer or tv or whatever- he will totally live! you're NOT a bad mom at all! you're a great mom because you're concerned!

  5. TV, shmee vee. Watch it. Enjoy it. You will not go crazy. JAx will be a happy healthy boy. Your favorite show will not ruin him. My Mattie watched tv as a baby. I will admit it! Niw she is a social, happy, very smart (already above grade level) little girl. There are worse things. Chillax girlfriend! :)

    P.S. I agree with Lacey. Get that boy on a schedule that keeps you sane! 12 am?! Rough way to go. ;)

  6. I agree with pretty much everything that's been said. Get him on a schedule or let him have alone time too. We are going on about a week now of Jackson being on a schedule and seriously, its the best thing I ever did. It gives me that hour or two at night to read, blog, watch a tv show, whatever. But also sometimes during the day I need/want to do something while he's I let him play in his bouncy chair or on his playmat or something. But really Ali, do what works for you three. Maybe it could be mckay and jax time...just them two. Or whatever. But remember, you are still Ali, not just mom. You need you time too

  7. I happened to see your post on FB and came to have a look. If you are into reading books about parenting etc. this book saved my sanity...
    "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child"
    It's pretty dry but if you skip all the detailed chapters about every little problem that affects sleep and just go to his age-range chapters it will give him a good start. Then you can go back and read all the dry stuff. All of my sisters use the book, too.
    Good luck, Mama :)

  8. I'm a new follower and also have a 5 month old (my first child). I agree with everyone else, it's ok to have him watch it for a few. My 5 month old, Sonny laughs and loves Sesame Street. I personally don't like having him sit and watch TV for hours. If I have to pay bills, do some quick housework, I'll have him in his bouncer and he watches the Sprout channel. My day revolvers around this little guy. He also has a bad sleep schedule. He has his nights and days reversed. He would fall asleep at 4 am and wake up at 4pm! He would wake up every now and then for his feedings but thankfully now he's out at 12am. I need to get him on an 8pm - 7/8am schedule...I don't know how it'll work but I'm glad I'm not alone on this night owl journey.

  9. I agree with Michelle!! I love the "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" Book, by Marc Weisbluth (or something like that? Can't remember his exact name.) ANyway, I wasn't one to read a ton of parenting books before Max or Ruby was born. There were just too many conflicting opinions out there and it was stressing me out. I thought I'd just "figure it out as i went." But I decided to buckle down and read at least ONE book that my friend gave me for a shower, and it was that book. It's awesome and its helped both my kids be good sleepers. It takes time to get your kid on a schedule, too. So be patient with it! My kids didn't start sleeping through the night until they were about 1 or so, but now they go down at 7 pm and wake up at 7 am or later a lot of days. Anyway, the TV thing is fine. Dont' beat yourself up over it. I let both kids watch tv and you NEED some time for yourself and your sanity! A little TV isn't going to hurt anyone! Don't let the extremists scare you.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...